The Romford Pele : It's Only Ray Parlour's Autobiography
Fairly run of the mill auto bio of a footballer. No amazing insights into the game or the team. But if you're a Gooner of a certain vintage you'll enjoy the read spanning Stroller's (George Graham) successful reign and then Arsene's from our first title for ages (when I was up a mountain in South America and missed all the excitement) until our fabulous Double seasons and The Invincibles. All the fun of the fair is described including Tony Adams' fall from grace, and then rise again, (although his auto bio is a far more insightful glimpse into the game) and the fact that the Non-Flying Dutchman aka Dennis Bergkamp was a compulsive practical joker. All the other Arsenal favourites are mentioned and for Gooners this will be a very enjoyable read. Not so sure whether those not enlightened by the best football team that the world has ever seen will enjoy reading it but hey, it's not written for them it's written for us who believed that Ray was our Pele. The sub title refers to a Chelsea fan commentator in an FA Cup Final where our hero picks up the ball and the famous words are uttered only for Ray to let fly into the top corner. Amy is a Gooner and writes a lot about the club so it's hardly going to be an unbiased book. But who in football wants objective opinions...
Morrissey Autobiography
A thoroughly entertaining account of Moz's life from childhood through to about 2010. Early sections bring back memories of how abusive schools were back in the 70s. Today about half the teachers would be up on child abuse charges - both physical and sexual. God only knows what went on which we didn't know about and I feel sick to my stomach when thinking about our Cub Scout troop activities. Anyways we're soon into Morrissey as a young man and getting into music and the formation of the Smiths. And then the acrimonious break up. The book is written in different sections and styles. But with a cynical and defensive, verging on paranoid, thread throughout. Not many who Morrissey comes into contact with come out shining and indeed even those who he seems to value and is close to he gives warts and all details of their foibles. Himself included in a gentler manner to be fair. Those he doesn't like come out looking like demons from hell, or simply complete losers. Geoff Travis of Rough Trade comes in for some stinging treatment which epitomises Morrissey's view that he is brilliant and everyone associated with him is simply leeching off him. The Smiths being helped by RT is simply not entertained. I didn't like the dig at The Raincoats either who I thought were far better than The Smiths but hey. The long passage about his court case rails against the legal system and all who sail her and as for his former band mates... dismissive is an understatement. Although this section is repetitive it's also extremely funny as Morrissey lets us inside his head - ranting people are repetitive aren't they? The rest of the book is about how he becomes the best live band since, well, ever and how much his fans love him and how his record sales are sabotaged by terrible management and a vindictive press. Some of the latter parts are a bit too much of a list of gigs played and how loved he is at them which seems a bit lazy and skips over a chunk of time. Likewise his relationships, platonic and not, which are not delved into in any great detail apart from Morrissey's feelings. But I guess this book is about how he feels in situations rather than facts about them. To be honest I guess we could google those. NME is often in the firing line - and he makes the distinction between the NME and the old New Musical Express, which is well made. I'm not certain that he's completely in the real world (and maybe he doesn't want to be in my version of that) or he's artificially bumping up his unique value to the world. Whatever, it's a brilliant read. Some parts I took as being completely his view and I read it a bit like fiction and who knows the truth. What I love is his single minded belligerence and faith in himself and his laugh out loud cutting down of those he has a pop at. An excellent read that at times is beautifully written especially when opening up his heart to us. Very different from your usual autobiography especially of those in the music business. I'd have like to have seen more about his veganism, which is mentioned in passing a number of times, and about his gladioli. Well worth reading - although you sort of glad that you don't have to spend a lot of time with him.
